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Diddy reveals he suffered through dark depression in 2019: “I honestly felt like I wanted to give up”


ABC/Lorenzo Bevilaqua Diddy was the picture of joy three weeks ago when he celebrated his 50th birthday with a who’s who of the entertainment and sports world.  Yet he admits 2019 was a year of “dark depression.”

The Bad Boy CEO was devastated by the death of the love of his life, and the mother of three of his children, Kim Porter, on November 15, 2018. Now more than a year later, he reveals the pain almost drove him to suicide.

“I honestly felt like I wanted to give up,” Diddy says in an Instagram video. “For a whole year I would have to say like I went through a real like state of dark depression. I’m telling y’all this because I had so many people to help me, to help lift me up.”

Diddy, born Sean Combs, was lifted up by numerous superstars at his birthday party on December 14 at his mansion in Los Angeles, including Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, Cardi B, Offset, Kevin HartTyler Perry, Queen Latifah, Kobe Bryant, and Leonardo DiCaprio.

Combs has built a media empire with his Bad Boy Entertainment, Revolt TV, and Sean John fashion line.  However, he admits his impressive achievements can’t erase the sadness of losing Porter.  

“Nobody’s immune to it. How much money you have. How much success you have, and depression is at an all-time high,” Diddy continues.

“We need each other. We gotta lift each other up,” he says. “Anytime you see somebody and they feeling down, lift ‘em up, lift ‘em up,” he urges. 

As Diddy continues to cope with his loss, he’s looking forward to another celebration.  January 25, he’ll be honored with the Grammy Salute to Industry Icons award during Clive Davis’ annual pre-Grammys party in Los Angeles.

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